…and your little dog too

I need a weekend to recover from my weekend. And I also could have used one to recover from my week. Actually, if you add it all up I could use a weekend to:

* Recover from work
* Gather the supplies for my various projects
* Do a couple of the projects
* Rest from all that
* Party
* Recover from hangover.

… and still make time to drink, dance, cook, and eat out.  So I guess all I have to do is find a new job that would let me take off till July. Say, is AU hiring?

Script for voiceover on HGTV design show:

“… and their two children: Madeline, 4, and Jack, 2″

Actual performance of voiceover:

“… and their two children Madeline4 and Jack2″

So is this show is about optimizing home design for families with several cloned children? But wait, she said TWO children. OMG what happened to the others???

My hairdryer has an “ion” switch. The ionized air is supposed to make your hair dry less frizzy.

(I switch on the Ion Switch)
My hair dryer: Whooooooooooo, iiiiioooooons. I’m totally blowing lots of ions at you right now.
Me: Are you being sarcastic, hair dryer?
MHD: Of course not. I’ve got a whole bag of ions right here to blow at you when you flip that switch. Whoooooooooo.
Me: Uh, ions are charged particles. I don’t really think they come in a bag inside my hair dryer.
MHD: Listen lady, you bought me for $20 at the CVS by your office. You’re lucky I even work.
Me: Touche. Just try not to short out if I drop you in the sink.
MHD: I promise nothing.

Blogged with Flock

Look, I don’t mean to hate on ASP developers as a whole; some of my best friends code ASP. But seriously, whenever I encounter some jacked-up internal server error on a website, I’ll gladly put money down that there’s gonna be an .asp(x) extension up in that address bar. After seeing this, oh, dozens of times over the past several years, I have decided that either:

a) ASP and .NET are stupid
b) ASP and .NET developers are stupid, or
c) Some combination of a) and b)

And sadly, the professional .NET developers I’ve met have not done much to convince me that it’s all option a.

Am I just being an open-source snob?  Yeah probably. But this is my blog, not yours, so nyah.

What’s your rabid technology bias? (rational or not)

Blogged with Flock

Christian, Christian. Wow. That boy is a talent. He is going to do wonderful things, sell brilliant clothes, and I will only see those clothes marked off 80% at the Ogdenville Outlet Mall. “Wow, can you believe it, a Christian Siriano!” “Yeah, but it’s kind of ripped. And stained. And it smells kind of weird.”Yeah, but it’s 80% off! Only $800, what a bargain!”

Jillian, darling. I want to wear everything you make; you’re my girl, hon. Maybe it’s just socially awkward Long Island girl solidarity, but I adore you, adore the clothes, and I just can’t wait to make Husband roll his eyes when I bring home yet another Jillian (”what? this one’s totally different from the other 25! It is!!”)

Producers, I was almost ready to give up on the show after the debacle that was Season 3. (For real, if I saw Vincent on the street, I’d flee into the safety of the nearest crack den.) But you brought it back this year, introducing me to amazing designers who will surely make me broke one day. I anxiously await the premiere of Season 5, which I will eagerly watch from my tin shack once I blow the mortgage payment on the Season 4 looks.*

* Note to Husband: I am kidding. I AM TOO! SHUT UP!!

Blogged with Flock

Tags: fashion, project runway

Me: I just realized why I’ve been slipping around so much.
Husband: ?????
[I show Husband the bare tread on my boots]
Husband: OHHHHHHH. I thought you said something else.

Blogged with Flock

I just click a little button, and it opens up a little bloggy window for me! TODO: investigate for massive security holes. Tomorrow. *yawn*. I’m sleepy. I’ll be sure to get right on that after a good night’s sleep.

Blogged with Flock

Supposedly I can blog directly from the Flock browser. This seems too good to be true, so clearly it is. This supposed “blog post” will probably send my credit card information to Nigeria.

Blogged with Flock

Todo list:

* Buy myself a pair of gigantic stripper platforms.

* Learn to walk in said platforms without breaking something important

* Wear platforms to all future shows at the 9:30 club so I can finally see the freaking band for a change.

Damn tall people.

That being said, 5 years later this Onion article is still really, really true.

TELEVISION WITHOUT PITY JUST STARTED RECAPPING OLD EPISODES OF THE WIRE!!!

This makes me entirely too happy. I think i just shed a tear.